Tuesday, March 22, 2016

26.2


Supposedly, marathons have a Greek origin. Something about running as far as you can to deliver a message and then dying. Regardless of who died while running, I can tell you that after my first it may have well as been me.

I completed my first marathon, The Shamrock on Sunday. I am now re-learning how to walk.

My goal was to go out in nine minute and forty-five second miles, and then swagger back the last thirteen miles at a nine minute fifteen second pace. What actually happened was I went out a little too fast, and I came back a lot too slow. I ended up finishing in four hours... Oh, I wish. It was four hours and eight unforgiving seconds. Salt to the wound, my Garmin says I ran an extra half mile.

The race was very well organized. I was impressed with electronic the check-pointing, the sheer volume of happy volunteers and all the hot stew and beer a guy could want in a big warm wind-proof tent at the end.





Sunday, January 10, 2016

Stairway


Currently there is a 16' extension ladder in the well where the Falcons loading ramp should be. I've pondered about what to do. Building this thing, it's always about the illusion of space ship and the reality of a treehouse.  Case in point, if I were to imagine that there really was a Lucasfilm movie prop hovering 12 feet over my backyard I would also have to see that even with the ramp open, it wouldn't be near to touching the ground. I think my solution will be to make a stairway slotted right up into the ramp well of the Falcon where the bottom half looks like something from Endor and the top half abruptly looks more monchromatic and architectural. Who knows, maybe Ewoks built a stairway to get to the ramp(?) Regardless, I need a big-honk'n stair case, and it's got to be good for out doors and pitched at a fairly steep grade of 40 degrees. 

So next problem. On a budget of 40 bucks a week, where do I find this staircase? Improvise. I found a poplar tree in the yard that had fallen but not all the way to the ground. In fact, on the slope where it has fallen to a good chainsaw working height from the ground. In stages I first striped the sides, top and bottom from the tree. Then came back with a protractor and ruler and marked it up. After some careful cuts I made the stairs, then I split them up the middle to make the runners. Now I have now made the runners for my custom staircase. I'll leave them attached to the stump and hanging in the air for a few weeks to dry. Once I'm ready, I'll cut them loose and see how they work in the treehouse.

Saturday, January 2, 2016

Convertible


I assembled several parts for the roof over the 'engine' part of the falcon today. The back fan of the falcon has 6 circular shapes. Maybe they are exhaust ports? Anyway, they look like the tops of 5 gallon paint buckets to me, so that's what I used. As part of a treehouse I wanted to make them into skylights for the interior. To do this I made 6 bucket-dimater holes through plastic white shed roofing, inserted the bucket collars in the holes and mounted the whole lot on a wood framed piece of plexiglass. The plexiglass will keep the weather out but let the light through.

The back fan is sort of pie shaped, the piece I completed today is a mostly square inset which slides away from the center of the tree. Sue requested that portions of the roof should roll back so that we can still enjoy the sky from the tree platform on a clear night. So, the Minimum Falcon is now a convertible.


Wednesday, December 16, 2015

Minimum Falcon


From Suz' Christmas letter: "Besides doing yet another Tough Mudder in October, he’s been working on a new treehouse! The original treehouse was in a tree that, unfortunately, succumbed to arboreal mortality, and wasn’t safe any more. Though it was a sad realization, it opened up the new possibility of designing and building an even better treehouse. Originally Quinn had decided to build a hexagonal treehouse. After laying the main beams out on the driveway though, Nate commented that it looked like it could be a Millenium Falcon (Han Solo’s ship from Star Wars). Challenge accepted! It’s a little smaller *koff*, so it’s called the Minimum Falcon. Construction is proceeding beautifully, and it’s a real joy to watch Quinn have such fun building something with his hands. The kids love to go help him too, so he’s got a good work force." ...more pics

Thursday, November 13, 2014

My Eulergy


A student in my Graduate studies Discrete Mathematics class made great comment last week that it is very satisfying when there is opportunity to apply what we learn in our everyday lives. To that end, I will share a personal obsessive compulsive issue I have that I am now free of thanks to this weeks coursework.

I really enjoy doing long trail runs on Sundays. There is a state park very near me where you can run about a half marathon's distance seldom seeing the same tree twice. The issue is, as hard as I try, sooner or later I end up looping up on a path I have already done. My obsessive goal is to run the entire park, running each trail only once. As of yet, this is a goal unfulfilled!


I studied Euler, and Hamilton graphs and circuits among other things this week. Where as Leohnard Euler was concerned with traversing the edges of a connected multigraph, William Hamilton was concerned with traversing the vertices.

The trail running issue is more of an edges objective. Fortunately if you are concerned with edge paths, there are some handy formulas to help you classify paths (Hamilton, not so much). We learned that a Euler circuit is classified as path which travels all edges and returns to the point of origin. Also there is a Euler path, this is a path which travels all edges but in so doing does not return to the point of origin. I've also seen authors call these paths "Eulerian Walks" and "nearly-Eulerian"[2] Walks, as well as "open" and "closed" Euler paths.

Euler proved a convenient theorem which states that all Euler circuits must contain vertices of even degrees. The degree of a vertex is simply the number of edges connected to the vertex. Euler's theorem makes sense upon reflection because in a circuit a line never dead-ends, it goes through points and keeps on going. So, every time we traverse through a point we use two edges. One going in, and one going out. These increments of two yield all the even degreed vertices.

Alas, I look at my Calvert Cliffs trail map (Links to an external site.)[3] and I see right away places where paths intersect in three or five ways. Oh no! Is there any hope for my OCD? I had to take pause in hopes that perhaps all is not lost. Then, I looked instead for a Euler path.

Euler says that we can have a Euler path, but only if our graph contains exactly two vertices of odd degrees. This also makes sense if you buy the Euler circuit explanation above. Simply imagine that you have two separate Euler Circuits and then you bridge them with one single line. Now observe, where you have added that edge. By joining the vertices in the previously separate graphs you have a incremented the degree of each by one. They were even, so now, they are both odd. So, in the resulting Euler path every line is traced in the first subgraph. We then trace across the bridge we added to the next subpath. Finally every line is traced in the second Euler circuit subgraph. We cannot cross the bridge again to get back to the origin, however, as a small concession at-least every edge has been traversed. Viola! Euler path.

Now I turn back to my running graph and look, there are actually more than two odd degreed edges, and unfortunately a pendant (the point by the water sticks out all in it's own with degree 1). I can however tweak some of the points into being even numbers. I do this in two ways. First, I  can generalize clusters of three way intersection as single n-degree points. The yellow circles are examples of places where I unified the intersections. Second, I added a new path which I make by running out to street bordering the front of the park. Lastly to deal with the pendant I figure, I can either give up and remove the line, or just have my run end at the end of the pendant.

Armed with my new graph that has only two odd numbered vertices I toast to mister Euler and start tracing. Twenty minutes later I am consulting the text book. After 5 failed attempts I have not found a Euler path! Perhaps I misread the theorem?

Trying again I do something different I start at one of the odd degreed vertices. Success! After this I notice something, any path I try which does not start and end at an odd degreed vertex is doomed to fail. I go to the library and after further research I find this:

"If the degree of both u and v is odd, then G, has a walk which begins at point u, contains every line of Gi exactly once and ends at point v; let us call Gu in this case nearly-Eulerian with respect to u and v."[2] So yes, this confirms it. You have to start and stop on a point which connects an odd number of trails for it to work.

It turns out that this is even true for pendants. Like the one I initially removed in red on the graph above. After all if you connect the pendant to an odd degree vertex, you've just made the connecting point even, and the far end of the pendant is still degree one. One is odd right? So, now I realize that I will be making the walk to the beach on the path I previously removed after all. Why not?

I'm happy to have a cure for my issue. It is a bummer though that after such a long run, I am at the furthest point from the parking lot. Oh well. I won't spoil it for you. Trace the graph and see if you can find the Euler path. I will put my answer in white font inside the brackets below, yours could be different: 
{k,n,m,i,j,h,e,p,o,q,r,b,a,g,f,c,d,s,t,water}
References:
[1] Rosen, Kenneth. Discrete Mathematics and Its Applications. Seventh Edition. New York: McGraw-Hill, 2012. 
[2] S. Goodman, Hedentniem S., Eulerian Walks in Graphs, SIAM Journal of Computing, Vol.2, No 1, March 1973
[3] mrhyker@midatlantichikes.com, http://www.midatlantichikes.com/calvercliffs.htm, (Links to an external site.) MidAtlanticHeights.com, April 2010

Friday, July 4, 2014

Chocolate Oatmeal Milk Stout

Quinn's Chocolate Oatmeal Milk Stout - ENJOY!
Boiled in late April, double fermented in glass carboys, bottled late May

Steeping grains at 150-158 for 30 min.

wort..(148F for 60+ min):
1 lbs  Black Patent Malt  (Annapolis Homebrew SKU: 18011)
8 oz lbs Carapils (Annapolis Homebrew SKU: 17110)
12 oz Chocolate Malt ((Annapolis Homebrew SKU: 17010)
8 oz Crystal 80 (Annapolis Homebrew SKU: 17111)
½ lb oats

boil:
1.5 oz Goldings at 60 min (same SKU as hopes below)
6 lbs Light Bulk Extract .. added in last 20 min or so (Annapolis Homebrew SKU: 25605)
1 lbs Lactose added last 15 min of boil (Annapolis Homebrew SKU: 27006)
.5 oz Goldings at 15 min (Annapolis Homebrew SKU: 20145)

yeast SafAle S-04 (Annapolis Homebrew SKU: 21008)

bottled w/ 4oz karo syrup





Saturday, May 24, 2014

Hefeweizen


I'm making a wheat beer today. It's a partial mash kit I bought from Annapolis Home brew. There are four pounds or Weyermann grains in this brew: three pounds Pale Wheat, three-quarters of a pound Pilsen, and a quarter pound Carafoam. There's also a little over four pounds of liquid malt extract in this partial. I'm not sure the type, it's light,  but not completely blonde. I'll be throwing about 2 ounces of Perle hops in at the beginning of the boil and a half an ounce of Hallertau in about fifteen minutes from the end of the boil.

I'm mashing now. This is the process where the sugars are leached from the grain in a hot water bath. The mash started at about 148 degrees F, which seems to be a temperature suited to both the wheat and barleys in the grain blend. To keep things steady I put the lid on my five gallon boil pot, wrap towels and blankets around it and put it in a big insulated cooler. This will give me an hour to do something I should have done quite a while ago. Blog my brewing.

Since we our return to the mainland, the change in seasons has inspired me to brew again. The crisp onset of Fall, changes in colors, and hearth of seasonal baked treats to warm chapped cheeks is a shoe-in for the malty smell of home brewing, and the mouthfeel and swallow of a home loved porter. I started again in September of 2013. Years ago I brewed in Norfolk Virginia with an interesting friend Mike Calderone. We occasionally made a good batch together, but more than that it was just something fun to do while watching a football game and getting families together. That was 2006, so the hiatus went about seven years.

I've been surprised how good the beers have come out in this my Act 2. Even Sue enjoys them. I think really it's about water, and cleaning. We've got better water here, and with age I've become more conscious of how to keep equipment better sanitized.  It's a shame that  I haven't kept track of the ten or so batches I've brewed in the last 6 months but I can probably at least recall what they've been. Here goes:
  • Stella Artois Clone
  • Honey Brown Ale
  • Pumpkin Ale
  • Nutella Porter
  • Brewferm Belgian Triples
  • Oatmeal Stout
  • Caribou Slobber Brown Ale (Northern Brewer)
  • Tequilla Oak Casked Golden Ale
  • Brewferm Diablo (Golden Ale)
  • Cocoa Oatmeal Milk Stout
  • Today's Hefeweizen
Cheers!

PS: starting gravity 1.040



Saturday, February 11, 2012

Why the New Wii is Black


The new Wii is probably black to commemorate all the games Wii patrons of the last decade can no longer play. As if thousands of titles cried out at once, and suddenly, were silenced. Tell me Nintendo, how much did you save you to leave out 4 female ADB ports and two legacy memory card slots? Was it worth it?

Buy a new Wii to replace your broken one? Here's a better idea. Get it repaired, it's better for the environment, and you can still play your old games. Nintendo offers repairs here. But I have a feeling that this won't be an option for long.

Your old white Wii is dead because it can't read disks. Makes sense right? It's the only moving part in the unit. You can fix this yourself for under $60. Less than that if you get a deal on the shipping. You will need a set of phillips hobby screwdrivers (like for fixing eye-glasses) and one of these ($3) because yet another proprietary screwdriver has been invented. Take apart your old wii (take pictures as you take out screws to keep track). Some screws are under small square stickers, some under silicone 'foot-pads'. Once you get inside, you should be able to remove the old wii-drive with 4 screws, then underneath detach two ribbon cables. One of those cables is a ZIF header (the socket lip hinges up). Then put one of these ($27 - $55) in.

Bada-boom, bada-bing!

Saturday, December 3, 2011

Ouija Poem

   
Long is the high to healing. Plunge wanton, into the desolate scar deep below the acacia heart. A missed casting? Like a school play from junior high. Circumstances are weather. They move as concerts and become a restricting embrace. Coral. One's rustic city, builds. The tree's heart yet arises, within a tower of emerald green.

Tuesday, March 8, 2011

Plastic

If you think about the winter without considering the cold, it's actually vey pleasant. Consider, no bugs, consider, being comfortable in jeans. Cloth snaps when you walk, coffee animates with steam. Skin doesn't itch. You don't perspire. A body in the winter is almost free of the coil. You might as well be made of plastic. Hair stays in place with out humidity to foil it. The folds of skin make no odor without sweat. Clothing can be layered like a preschool doll with no discomfort no redness, no oil, no itching. Aside from cold, winter is a festidious paradise.


I noticed something last week. In the tropics it wouldn't have really meant anything. There was a bug out of place. Yes, a bug. Why is this strange? It was a big huge stink bug, about the size of the last digit of my thumb. Also, the bug was kicking on it's back, right in my path. Furthermore, the bug had the distinct look of being, fat, happy, and dying all at the same time. This bug had survived something, it was so proud of surviving, that it didn't even mind dying while I watched. It probably wanted me to step on it just so that its accomplishments could end at the pinacle of accomplishment. Glorious, profitable, radiant and kicking.


Oddly, the bug wasn't my first clue that my world was about to change. It was all starting to add up, like the scene in a movie where the protagonist is being hurled by a rocket sled on rails into an iconic brick wall, flipping through prequel memories. In my case, I flashed back to leaving the house. I put on a sweat shirt this morning. It felt TACKY!


Tackiness.


Tackiness, bugs, clouds in puffs not wisps, ground that sinks when you walk on it. I know what this means, what does it mean? Think back. Think! before Hawaii. This happens every year. This phenomenon, I think I remember. I know it's name, "Spring". My days of perfect skin are over.


Ha ha, but maybe, so is the cold.

Friday, November 26, 2010

James V. Brown


Why is it, that it seems that our most creative ideas seem to spring forth, Athenian fashion, moments before sitting down to something "productive"? I  think today the tonic of inspiration was contrived from equal parts of household freedom, a solid exercise session, and cold air hitting me in the face while drinking a warm cup of coffee.

I knew I would be visited by the spirit of creativity when I pulled up in front of the James V. Brown library still sipping my coffee. I began to notice the details of the former 'Millionaire's City'. A city that around the turn of last century had more coal Barron's than you could make a Los Angeles subdivision out of. Each one besting the other with beautiful ornate houses. These were monstrous, stain glass, three-story, main street houses with natural rock foundations, round rooms, gold trim, turret windows, spires, domes, trellis work, wrought iron, stain glass and on and on. Houses with large front decks meant for drinking summertime mint juleps in picket fence white adirondack chairs, and laughing through green teeth at the smell of sausage sized cigars.

The engine off, looking again, tendrils of steam massaging my face inside a 21st century Honda steel and glass bubble, I'm looking at the still-life show of civil architecture. They aren't grand homesteads anymore, they are a patchwork of houses that have became parcelled up into the fractions of themselves. The main streets of Williamsport Pennsylvania use the residence of the long deceased Lords of Suet to host colonies of shops, bars, apartments, coffee houses, thrift stores, barbers shops, and all merchants of goods and services for the warm-hearted cold people of the modern city. Each tenant in the house trying so hard to set itself aside from all the other partitions of the house that the house itself falls into schizophrenia. Porches laugh now only to dispel their mania.

So...

I'm headed into the library of my wife's home town, initially inspired by some code I wanted to write for work. No hurry really, it's not a work day, and we'll be heading South to Maryland soon enough. I suppose I'll get around to it after I purge these prose from my hands.


It's the day after Thanksgiving. For me,  there is a lot to think about. It's quite a different thing to have Thanksgiving in a place where you wouldn't expect you'd want to be, versus one, say, like a tropical island.

In the tropics, the heat hitting your face, sand on the floor boards of your car, shuffling your family to the neighborhood Turkey dinner, it requires almost no deep introspection to be thankful. Anyone living in Hawaii, even those that are broke beyond health-care will tell you they are "living the dream". This year, at Thanksgiving, I'm not living it. I'm feeling it.

Mom and dad hosted a feast yesterday. My young in-laws, and an aunt and uncle were there as well. There was turkey, ham, oysters cooked two different ways, creamed corn, stuffing, lima beans, enough mashed potatoes to sculpt. Pies, cakes, rolls, bars and coffee. Was I grateful for the food? Maybe, though it certainly was delicious. I was grateful for the smile Sue had, home again for Thanksgiving for the first time in 5 years. I was grateful for the way the other cousins played with my kids. I was grateful for the love, support and forgiveness of the family I married into, especially because of the way I play cards!

This year, Thanksgiving was more than beer, sun on my face, and a full belly. This year Thanksgiving was about people and laughing, and caring enough about the people talking to me that I didn't really care what we were talking about.

Monday, November 8, 2010

Jigsaw



Immediately after the five of us re-entered the atmosphere on the East coast, the twenty-second of October, we hajjed the kids up to Williamsport Pennsylvania to stay with Sue's generous parents until we could establish some order at our new Maryland outpost. Until now, the kids have been there while I've worked, and Sue has researched schools and living arrangements. We missed Halloween as a family, but I'm sure that the kids enjoyed a long stay at Grammy and Grandpas.

After two weeks on our own Sue and I drove up to collect our three treasures. Nearly five hours North, Williamsport, is in an area famous mostly for the hillside stadium hosting the end of the little league baseball season. It's a fascinating coincidence that Hawaii tykes have been to the championship twice since we lived on Oahu, in fact winning in 2008. Six time zones away from paradise, it's hard to imagine that such a distant microcosm could be a happenstance Hawaiian hub.

With us all together, this weekend, it was great to be a family again. After all the driving to pick the kids up, we had a lazy Sunday morning. We spent it mostly in pajamas working on a jigsaw puzzle. At lunch time we went for a picnic walk in the woods by the bay. Sue made us roast duck for dinner.

Saturday, October 30, 2010

Solomons

Following our time at the Back Creek Inn† bed and breakfast on Solomons, Susan and I have spent the last 4 nights in a run down Days Inn motel closer to the Patuxant River Naval Air Station around the Great Mills area of Maryland*.

The last few days we've been trying to figure out the best area to settle in. Schools are a major factor for us, our middle child has some special needs. So choosing where to live is largely the result of finding the school that can best support his IEP.

We are looking to be in the area long term, so it makes sense to buy a house, especially in this this low interest buyers market. In the near term though, we need a place to rent for a few months while we pull together the equity for a down payment, and research the area.

Yesterday was a busy day, we think we've narrowed in on the school, Dowell Elementary in Southern Calvert. Other good options are Patuxant and Appeal Elementary schools. These schools all have staff historically familiar with the ISLE (Intensive Structured Learning Environment), and as such are familiar with special needs children.

Yesterday we also found a short term rental condominium‡ which feeds into Dowell. This is fortuitous, as it would be excellent to start renting in the same area we plan to buy in. We started with Dan Cannon, the real estate agent helping us with the contract details, and we are hoping to be able to start moving out of the Days Inn (!!!) and into the condo sometime this weekend.

The kids are staying up at my in-laws until we get this detail ironed out. What a treat it would be to get this together in time to run North and Trick or Treat with them tomorrow, and also have them in a new home they can start school from on Monday.

Thanks for your prayers, and happy meditations on this one.

* (not on map)
† (3,P on map above)
‡ (4,N on map above)


Monday, October 25, 2010

Training Day

Sue and I visited my in-laws in Northern Pennsylvania over the weekend. The GPs graciously offered to watch the kids, while we came back down South to get started, and figure out how to get settled. Last night, and tonight we have stayed at a quaint Bed & Breakfast, The Back Creek Inn, near Solomans Island just ten minutes from my new employer.

My first day was today. The company is a small but capable group of about twenty people, about half on site at the Maryland office where I will work. There was a company meeting today, and I was excited to see that my name was already in the project schedule as a resource for existing projects. It's a good feeling to hit the ground running with management that knows just where to apply your talents.

Friday, October 22, 2010

Transporter

Thursday turned ended up as more of a Thriday. It's the artifact of bridging together one super busy day with the next, via a 6 hour timezone transfer.

I think Sue and I were better off not knowing what lay ahead of us when we woke that morning. It wasn't much of a good night's sleep to begin with. Sleeping on a deconstructed cardboard box, packing foam and coats from a forgotten closet, we woke sore and boney. I think the only reason we slept at all was that Wednesday we had spent the entire day getting the 16' PODS trailer loaded, closed, and adieu'd.

Thursday was all about leaving the island, getting the van to leave the island too, and coping with the realization that our house really needed a 20' trailer and so we still had about a thousand pounds of miscellaneous possessions lying around the house to deal with before we left.

Sue and I had our routines down. I was the burly box loader, junk transporter, and Sue was the game-master organizer, packer. We divided our remaining possessions in the ex-home into 3 piles: junk, parcel-post, and give-to-friends.

I spent the better part of the morning turning the family van into a Sanford and Son extra. All the passenger interior seats folded in, I stuffed the vehicle to capacity. Wooden tennis rackets, unmatched athletic equipment, broken tiki torches, gloves without mates, video equipment from the pre-wireless era, world in a blender. Then, all my half cut lumber, particle board, a desk and two sawhorses twined to the roof rack on top, I finally headed off to the dump.

Sweaty, and red dirt glazed, I returned from the Kapolei dump to gather the twenty or so boxes that Susan had labored to assemble for posting. Cumbersome, I leaned into four handcart loads to get the parcels from the van to the counter.

By the time I got back to the house, it was already three o'clock. The timeline had crumbled. Things got messy, and I ended up going straight from the house in my junk clothes to get the van delivered to the pier where it was shipped minutes before they closed. Friends from work shuttled me from the Sand Island Pier back to the airport area.

While that was going on, our friend Ceci Adams chanced by the house, and saw that Sue badly needed help wrapping up and getting to me at the airport. She quickly canceled all her other plans for the evening and made it happen.

Fortunately, it was an evening flight. We had time to rendezvous at the airport and get dinner together before we left. Fifteen hours, two connections, and some cat-naps later we arrived in Baltimore.

Wednesday, October 6, 2010

Bye Bye Bye

Well, it happened kind of suddenly, but it happened. We are leaving Hawaii at the end of the month and moving to the Patuxant River area of Maryland. I've accepted a position with a company that services and upgrades flight simulators (among other things). I'm looking forward to the change in the job, Sue is excited about returning to the mid-Atlantic, and the kids are stoked that they have a dead-lock on Christmas at Grammies house.


Saturday, September 4, 2010

Props

Jen Schumacher, quite the open water swimmer, keeps a tidy blog. She and I were both part of the Kaulakahi gang. Here's some of her links from the channel. Keep an eye on her. She's planning to do the Catalina channel soon. Good Luck Jen!

Jen's Kaulakahi Links:
The Epilogue

Other related links:

Friday, September 3, 2010

Welcoming Committee

It's been a strange week. I called Jeff and remarked to him on the phone today, "I think I know what the astronauts felt like the week after they got back from the moon".

In their case, they were hand picked by our government, trained and prepared for years. One day in the midst of all that hard work, they walked in a place so sacred, so remote that only the meta-physical hearts of philosophers and astrologers had preceded them. They bounded like kangaroos in near weightlessness while looking through a gold visor.

The next week, gravity is back. Your bones are sore. Tripping over door thresholds half an inch high., Driving terrestrial vehicles to work. Without a doubt, they had to know, that the greatest moment in their life, and maybe in the lives of any man in history, was over. How do you go to a store, buy a gallon of milk, fill up your car, and mow the lawn with that bitter gem rolling around in your brain pan?

I didn't go to the moon. But I did journey with a very special team of people. We ended up swimming twenty miles in open ocean. I saw (perhaps evaded?) deep water sharks, I don't know, four times? I body surfed into a forbidden island over lava rock, walked the sand, and then was chased off at rifle point. I drank deep from it. I lived a lot. I don't think I will ever swim a channel like that again. I don't think I would even wish it on myself if I could. Anyway, regardless it's over.

Once again, I'm a computer programmer. A guy at a desk. My most important job is to be a husband and father. Don't misunderstand, that IS a real treasure, warmer than brandy in egg-nog. But, my point is, the excitement, the FIGHT, the achievement, the goal and the reward. It's over; the glory days were last week.

Often times, when I'm making sense of what I'm feeling, art helps. Sometimes it's also utilitarian. Unlike a camera, your mind is always with you. If you are lucky enough to be able to draw what you have in your mind, it really helps alleviate the personal scale 'cosmic whimper'.

I got sick of fighting with compilers and computers this evening, and switched to paper and pencils. I thought very hard about what I remembered from my Ni`ihau welcoming committee (you can read about the incident in the post below). When you draw something like this, it is very important that you remember the details before pencil goes to paper. Images, and especially video have a way of replacing memories. If you draw a lie, soon it will be the truth in your mind. When you reflect the truth onto paper, it's a wonderful feeling. Like memories as water running down your shoulders and off your finger tips.

Good therapy for the welcome home blues.


Tuesday, August 31, 2010

Blue Road to Ni`ihau





August 28

Tonight I am staying as a guest at the Pacific Missile Range Facility beach cottages. Two of the four people making the crossing with me are in the Air Force, making our stay possible.

It’s a good thing too; there isn’t much on the West side of Kauaʻi. It’s basically the sandy dry forgotten spot of the otherwise lush “Garden Isle”. The state road even peters out here before it can make a complete circumnavigation back to the North.

Tomorrow morning we are going to make an incredible trek to an even more desolate spot. Niʻihau. Captain Don will meet us at a quarter of dawn. We will swim out and past his boat waiting for us off-shore. He will guide and accompany us from a distance as we swim the Kaulakahi Channel, the seventeen mile wide body of water separating Kauaʻi from Niʻihau. Our slow moving flotilla will consist of four swimmers, a kayaker, a paddleboarder, and a 34’ long fishing boat with a crew of four.

Everyone else has just shuffled off to rest up. It’s ten on Saturday night. We will wake at five, and be on the beach in front of the cottage half an hour later.


August 29

It’s unusual before such a big event, but I slept like a baby. The cottage had two rooms and three beds between them, with a hide-a-bed for a fourth person (me) in the living area couch. The area has a sliding glass, screen patio door which opens up to the ocean. I opened the glass door but left the screen shut. The sweet lullaby of Hawaiian surf hitting the sand was my dream machine.

On the edge of sleep I started to hear creatures outside. There was one which barked a noise which sounded like “pull! pull!”. The other two or three voices just sounded like angry moaning. The little bit of rational conscious I had left summarized that it was a probably just a bunch of animals in heat. Something big and dog-like. Maybe some monk seals. I was happy to have an answer for myself and slipped off to sleep.

My first dreams turned the noise into the legend of Barking Sands Beach. The legend explains how Barking Sands got its name. The sand there is so fine in some places it feels more like talc than sand. Some people say that when you walk over it, the unique qualities of the sand make it bark as a strider’s heals break out of the wet mixture.

According to legend, however, there was once a fisherman with nine dogs. One particularly stormy day before he set out, he staked his companions’ tethers to the ground before he left. After a while his pets missed him and began to bark and whine. Around and around the stakes they ran, calling for him, until they sucked themselves into the ground. Now when you walk on the beach you can hear them barking from below, calling for their master still.

In my dreams, “pull! pull! pull! GROAN…” (let us up please). Then blackness.

My alarm was set to wake us up at 5, half an hour before the boat arrived. The morning was on rails, everything was laid out. I didn’t really want a ton of extra time to think about what I was doing. Just execute. I woke up fifteen minutes earlier than planned. My veteran channel swimming friend, Bill, started a pot of coffee. The smell of coffee in the morning warms me all over. I crawled out of my hide-a-bed to put my feet on the cold tile floor. The coffee was warm and good. Some days, when you know that you are going to be cold all day, you can use your mind as a trap to hold onto the warmth of a cup. When you are naked, chilled to the bone in the ocean, you can go back to that mug. Hold it under your nose. Let the steam dance over your eyes and cup your hands around it, as if in prayer. Capturing and keeping mental Polaroids like those are sanity survival tools, I would imagine, for any endurance athlete. Visualize what you like, visualize what you want, visualize what completes you, makes you comfortable, what you are, and what you want to be.

The boat was late; Captain Don didn’t think so though. He was just a half a mile further down the beach thinking we were the late ones. The modern cell phone in many cases has replaced citizen’s band radio. Bill called Don and straightened it out. A phone call and a series of flashlight signals later we were lining up with the boat.

We had met Don and his powerful, immense boat-hand Calvin the night before to review the plan at Hanapepe Harbor. We gave them most of our supplies and nutrition (food in bottles) that evening. Even still, I had one thing yet to get to him on the boat. Susan set up a RunKeeper account on my iPhone to help track the swim. The plan was to keep that plugged into a cigarette lighter on the boat. It would draw a nice Indiana Jones line of our travels, which would be updated live on the net. This would keep our families happy, since they would know where we were throughout the day.

The support crew, Jen’s parents, and Jeff swam out to the boat while the swimmers waited on the beach. The surf was 5 foot on the face, the boat about 40 yards out. I decided that I would take my own phone out to the boat instead of asking Steve (Jen’s dad) to do it. I had the phone inside of three Ziploc bags, and a plastic grocery store bag as I hopped over the surf and swam out. The bag was in my teeth. Swimming something between breast stroke and doggy paddle out to the boat.

The application had a female voice announcing my progress. We just watched the old Clash of the Titans a couple weeks ago. I felt like I was paddling out with Medusa’s head in a sack. It was about the same size with all the bags. “Distance travelled, ..Zero, point, Zero miles, … average pace …”. Nothing like starting a trek like this with a voice in a sack droning.. “zero”. Ah well, progress increases infinitely once you actually start something.

Jeff paddled over. I must have looked comical as he retrieved the talking sack. I went back to the beach to join the other three Argonauts, for the “official” start. It was 6:05 AM HST. I started the bright orange stopwatch, a gift from Sue. We all did something like shake hands and back slap. The surf came at us like a wall that morning. It wasn’t like we dove in, or walked out and ducked under. It was like the beginning of twenty miles of ocean started with a greenish brown force field that held the water in a vertical, concave wall. All we did was pick a spot and dive through it.

Brian and I were chomping at the bit at first, and Bill stayed back with Jen. The boat was trying to launch an ocean kayak about the size of a Lil’Tykes yard toy. It was ridiculous, but it was all the Capt. Don could provide for Barbara today. Jeff was somewhere between us all. Arbitrating the kayak launch, the swimmers in the rear and the trajectory of the swimmers in the front, Jeff was in the zone. He some how accomplished this feat without any one of us missing him when we needed his input or guidance.

Jen is from LA. She came out with her parents, Barbara and Steve, for a family holiday with her sisters, and to bag a channel while she was there. In her home waters, there are some pretty ferocious creatures. Great Whites. Understandably, when Jen goes out, or when she swims the channel to Catalina Island (23 miles), she’s loaded for bear, or in this wilderness, shark. The ocean kayak Barbara paddled was outfitted with a “Shark Shield”. I will call it the shield. It's an electrical device which dangles in the water and is supposed to prevent unwanted guests. I talk around that word, I don’t like to use it. I won’t use it again the rest of this story, although I will see them a total of four times before the end of the day. Keep reading.

We had discussions about the kayak the night before. It looked like a kayak sawed in two and then squared off in the back so that no water could get in. It was a toy; Jeff’s paddle board, at 12 foot, dwarfed it. The three of us from Oahu made a dead pool time line for kayak. My bet was 4:20.

Bill and I were used to breaks on the hour, Jen every thirty minutes. Though he is an awesome swimmer, Brian considers himself a triathlete, so he could fuel up at any interval. The compromise we agreed on was that we would “feed” every forty-five minutes.

The first hour, we learned about each others’ paces. Jen was still warming up. Her speed would set the pace. At the first break, in the four minutes it took to eat, we discussed pace. Jeff also told us where we would aim, and how we should paddle. Our goal was to stay in a pocket between Jeff and the boat.

The boat, at 34 feet, was almost too big to be a fishing boat. Captain Don is a skilled navigator, and even still the boat would skitter around sluggishly trying to compromise between the current and the thrust of the prop. Jeff could hold a smooth direct line. That far out, the “rum line” (the shortest line to destination) is easy to plot if you have some geography to look at. Jeff’s head, 20” higher than ours, could see the shadow of the mountains of Niʻihau, and the little off-shore crater to the right of it. Our course was pretty much right between them. Jeff’s line was steady and true. His course was the derivative of the boat’s. I would keep the boat in my left eye’s peripheral vision, but stay on Jeff’s course, following his board’s underwater fin, visible on my right.

By the second break, the sun was up enough for us to look back and see a vanishing Kauaʻi. Still green and very curious about what were up to. What’s the matter? Didn’t you enjoy the cool breezes and the song of the surf? Wouldn’t you like to lay on my beaches today? What are you doing in that water, the bunch of you? Swimming away from me to my grumpy cousin. He won’t greet you, you know. All he has for you there is sand and rock. Come back. I’ll forgive you.

Don was briefing us while we ate. He interrupted himself mid-sentence to say loudly and clearly. YOU ALL NEED TO COME CLOSER TO THE BOAT… NOW! We knew what it meant; we tried to do exactly what Don said, to listen to his words, not his perception. We huddled near the wall of the boat. I think I heard someone shriek in spite of themselves. I think I heard Bill say to Barbara with “the Shield”, “Is that thing on?” Don didn’t tell us until it was over that he saw something just under Brian’s foot. A fast brown shape.

We resumed our swim. Half an hour later, though my brand new goggles, I saw a muscular shape in the water about twenty feet below. It was long like a dolphin, but its tail moved side to side, not up and down. There were more fins than a dolphin, and the shapes were very angular. We were being circled. I stopped and made eye contact with Don, announced what it was and pointed down. Don asked if it was brown or if the nose just looked wrong. I said “no”, I said the head looks flat and more bill shaped from the top. The head was kind of mineral green. “Galapagos”, he said. It’s probably fine, he’s just checking you out.

Our Galapagan escort circled us and faded in and out from the deep at least three more times over the next three miles. It was like he was either curious, or couldn’t make up his mind about something. Finally Bill and Jeff saw him. Jeff the paddler, also had a rig on his board to hold onto his camera. He tried to get a picture, but, trying to get a picture of a sh__k from the surface while piloting a twelve foot beach rescue board is about as easy as photographing a cheetah on the Serengeti after surveying him through a soda straw. Jeff missed.

The last time I saw “the man in gray”, he was about 30 feet below me. I could see him if I looked down in a line to my toes. It’s amazing how they seem rather cat-like, the tail flicking back and forth, swimming as easy as thought. He was ascending slowly, closer. Finally I poked my head up and yelled to Captain Don, “He’s still following me! What should I do?” Don said, “I would go down and go after him, yell at him”. Whatever, I thought, it’s better than being followed. I ducked down to try and surprise the gray menace but I think he knew he’d been had. The last I saw of him, he took a clockwise (yes Jeff, clockwise) turn down and faded out of view under the boat.

I should tell you that to fade from view in open ocean Hawaiian waters, is saying something. You can see to about 110 feet in the clear blue here. Maybe more. My favorite thing about channel swimming is getting to visit ‘the blue sun’. you can think of it as like an inverse sun flare that you see looking straight down to infinity in a clear ocean. I think that it’s probably made from your own shadow and the shafts of light that converge underneath it. I may have realized this because when I swim close to Jeff with his beach rescue board, the blue sun is longer, like a cat’s eye. It is beautiful and so mesmerizing that if you don’t keep your eyes on the rum line cues, you will swim forever and always feel pleasantly on course, and never be done. It wouldn’t matter; you would crawl inside your own mind and follow the siren, happy and lost.

The blue sun was beautiful. It was, however, very occluded on this trip. There were thousands of miniature asteroid-shaped, clay colored particles in the water. They were about the size and color of half an eraser head from a classic #2 pencil. Usually when I see these, it means that I am swimming through thousands of tiny jellyfish. Bill likes to call them “no-see-ums”. Every one of them that hits your skin leaves a mark, a mark which in two days time turns into a welt the size of an M&M candy. Today, this was often the case, but sometimes, there was no stinging, a nice surprise.

We reached the middle of the channel in about four hours. What was odd was that, in the middle of the channel, you don’t expect to see life, you expect to see blue, above and below, but no life. Not the Kaulakahi. There were flocks of birds screaming so low to the ocean, I nearly batted one out of the sky on a feeding break. What they were probably there for were the fish below. The fish were in schools of about a hundred, each were composed of blue silver fish about three inches long. I agreed with the birds, they looked like herring, or something, good enough to eat.

Another trend started to occur. Jen was ON now, moving. Brian, our triathlete and first-time channel swimmer, was starting to feel it. I know Brian; I’ve done several four mile swims with him. Like many athletes, Brian has a sort of a ‘tell’ when he gets tired. His mind shuts down. He stops answering questions, he stops making eye contact.

Two weeks ago I got suckered into a sprint triathlon with Brian. He took second place in the whole thing, in a field of hundreds. I was first out of the water, but still came in about 100th overall. Brian is an amazing athlete. I consider swimming to be easy, you just ..move your arms and stuff. I was starting to feel guilty. Did I pressure Brian into this thing? Just because we did 6 or so four milers together for training with mean splits, did that mean he was ready for a twenty mile channel?

For the next six hours, I felt my own pain, but I also felt Brian’s. Two hours from the finish we were only a mile away. Brian needed to see the bottom, he was focused on the bottom, finding it, but his stroke was all off, his direction had gone haywire, and his left arm looked limp. What had I gotten him into?

Jeff, also an Ala Moana beach City & County lifeguard, urged me to stay with the boat. Jeff stayed back with Brian and I moved ahead to rejoin the fray. We were going to finish this thing. We could see the soft white beaches on the low plain of Niʻihau. I could see the shiny wet sand and distinguish it from the dull white high water sand. We were almost in the boat. I was almost sipping a beer, I was basically putting my teeth into a six topping bacon cheeseburger, I was walking on the sands of Niʻihau, the warm sand. Ha ha, maybe the people of the last true Hawaiian island were preparing a lu`au just for our band of triumphant swimmers. Reality: it’s another hour of being cold, and very very smart. Swim Quinn, … just keep swimming.

My RunKeeper app failed about halfway across the channel. We’d gone beyond the range of a cell phone tower to relay the data. Back home, anybody watching us on the map could’ve been convinced that we were swallowed by an Old Testament whale on our way to Ninevah under the face of an untrackable sea. Fortunately, completely unbeknownst to me, Jen also had her own GPS tracker in the 4:20 dingy still faithfully trailing (via tow line) behind the boat where it had been parked since mid channel. If you look at her GPS plot. You will notice that it stops just short of Niʻihau. The surf had gotten completely rough and rotten. The dingy never went in, and neither did Jeff’s paddle board; it was that bad.

Jen, Bill and I waited outside the overhead surf pounders that were walloping the Eastern shore of the little island. We were waiting for Brian. The idea was to all go in together. Our landing could potentially be interpreted as hostile. Niʻihau is a privately owned island. Anything above the high water line is trespassing, but according to story, any incursion at all was kapu (taboo, or off-limits). If we were going to breach the island, we were going to do it together.

We waited for Brian. At first we couldn’t even see him. I remarked to Bill that I was pretty sure he was in the boat by now, and if he wasn’t, he should be. I felt bad, and I wanted it to be over for him. I wished a hot towel around his head. I wished that he was home with his wife, Akiko, and his baby girl. I wished that we’d shot the Au`au together instead of this tumbling, shark-infested, potentially criminal escapade.

I went to the bottom to pass the time. I wish I had a picture for you. The bottom there pops up quickly, only a quarter mile from the island. It isn’t colorful; I only saw one pencil coral. It’s gray, and the lava rock at the bottom seemed to split into odd shaped dinner plate size tiles or weird odd shaped polygons, like nonagons and septagons edge on edge. Imagine cracks in clay soil that was recently watered on and then left to dry for a day. Crazy splits, but gray, and hard, and unforgiving. Often in the very middle of a polygon was a carnation size cauliflower coral polyp. No color, just white and gray. Maybe the island itself knew, no one was welcome. No splashes of color, no welcoming flare. Go away.

In places, clumps of polygons were pulled free. They made a bowl where the real color of the offshore reef... the fish... could hide and play. I saw many colorful fish in these shelters from the surf.

When I was done visiting the fish I popped back up to the surface. Bill was surveying our most promising-looking approach. The surf was making things very hard. Overhead waves crashing on lava rock after ten hours of not using your legs. Bad things. Bill looked concerned. I checked the horizon. Where is Brian?

Jen shrieked. Something else was in the surf with us, what was it? The cries continued, I looked under the surf, nothing on her. That is good. I did notice a huge number of the eraser-like items floating in the water. Could it be these? Maybe she has a bigger reaction to them than I do. I popped back up, “Get it off me! they are everywhere”. Jen charged the boat. What makes a channel swimmer head to the boat five minutes from the end of her trek? I was confused. panicked. It sounded like they were eating her alive. What is it? What’s in the water with us? It must be jellyfish. I thought, Calm, breathe, count your breaths. She’s going to make it to the boat. She’ll be okay. They have some salves there, it’s probably jellyfish.

A couple minutes later she came back, she shrieked again. I felt something. It felt like a hot wire across the back of my neck. Bill and I both yelped. What? Oh. Man o’ War. I pulled what felt like a ramen noodle off my neck. Bill had them on his forearm. Jen was back, where’d she come from. She was yelling too. Bill saw one, a Man o’ War stuck on the back of her neck. Bill calmed her, asked her to hold still, she did. Bill adeptly pulled the beastie off of her. Everyone calmed.

Waves were breaking overhead, with us bobbing in only four feet of water. We ducked each one and waited it out. Bill scouted ahead while we waited for Brian, and on his first return he came back without his goggles. The surf was merciless, and pounding on the same kind of lava rock I had seen below. It was a white sand beach alright, but with black teeth all the way to the water’s edge. We might have swum ten hours to look at a beach from a football’s throw away.

Jeff came in from behind a dynamic horizon. There was Brian’s red swim cap bobbing in the surf. His left arm looked like it had been frog-punched, his stroke was down to a sloppy slap. He made it! They made it! We were all going to finish together.

The finish wasn’t as we expected. Everyone completed the channel in their own way in the end. I will tell you how it happened for me. I pretended like I was at Ehukai Beach (Pipeline) in Oahu, home of overhead pounders. I watched the waves. Timed them. How many waves in a set, okay 3, no wow, 4. Where do they break? Where do they collapse? Foam? Backwash?

The answer was: hug the coral where the overhead wave breaks, KICK! Dig in if you have to, but WAIT till the set ends. After the set, move back about eight feet. The next wave in the set will foam after the crash, drag you in three inches of water over the coral. With the foam though, it would be about five, maybe six inches. Think puffy thoughts. Ride the foam.

It worked. I barely got scratched on the way in. No rips in the suit. I came to a kind of furious tide pool of black rock and sea urchin. Don’t step on those either. Especially the black ones. I looked for some white sand in the middle of a rock pool pukas (holes). Ah.

My right foot was first. I had to pull it around with my arm. My body was so used to the ocean’s surface that the world was still moving with a beat, a rhythm. I tried to stand. Fail. Caught my fall with my right arm. Okay, find another puka. Where will my left foot go? Finding a spot, I fell on my right knee... a little scrape. Jagged rocks in front, legs waking up, world shifting, I panic, I have turned my back to the waves for what? Half a set cycle! Quick, look, wait. Okay, I’m okay, my estimates were good. I’m okay. No waves coming. For about the next half a minute, the cycle repeats. Look for a safe foot spot. Check for urchins, straddle, wade, lift, crawl.

Sand.

When I reach the sand at the end of a channel I usually like to stand, then flop on the beach, let the sun bake me for a minute and laugh. Laugh! The absurdity of it. The resources expended! For what? It’s stupid, vain, and utterly pointless. A man swims from one island to another. The sea begrudgingly grants him passage so that he can learn something about himself. When he gets there he laughs. He has learned nothing except that the trip which has brought him here has served only as a lens to inspect everything he already knew about himself before he got in the water. The finish as an experience, it’s a moment in time so small that it is over before it began. In the end, I am an idiot trespasser on an island that isn’t mine. As if any man can own God’s creation. Laugh! Laugh until it hurts at the big blue sky.

Today my favorite funny-bone moment was not to be. Captain Don sports an enormous Hubble telescope-sized pair of binoculars. He spotted three people on the horizon two hours before my abominable transurftitude. Don told us at our next to last feeding, “I see three of them, they are waiting there for us.”

I’ve heard three stories of how people are greeted at Niʻihau. I’ll summarize them now.

Story one...

The Captain of the Island Dream, a large pink-sailed catamaran which hosted an outing for the Waikiki Swim Club in 2008, told me that as a boy he and a friend floated on a piece of wreckage (I’ll omit the beginning of the story, because I suspect he was elaborating somewhat) to within site of Niʻihau. At that point, they abandoned the Winslet & DiCapriesque piece of boat dander and flopped themselves on the warm gorgeous shores of Niʻihau. While supine, two large Polynesians jumped him and his friend, jumped them, gave them both black eyes and nose bleeds (I think a broken rib too) and told them to leave the island. They crawled back in the water and swam back to Kauaʻi. Ahem! yeah. k.

Story two...

From the guidebook, Kauaʻi Revealed... “If you land on a beach on Niʻihau, you will be asked to leave. If you refuse, a truly gargantuan Hawaiian gentleman will be summoned, and he will ask you a bit more firmly. This request is usually sufficient to persuade all but the most determined individuals to leave.” Probable.

Story three...

From Captain Don himself. A pair of gentlemen experience some kind of failure in their boat, and wash up on Niʻihau. Stranded, they traverse the beach for a while. Two large Polynesian men confront them and draw a line in the sand. They tell them not to cross it. The next day they are confined to the waters and the boat and told “You cannot walk on our land”. I’m not sure how the story ends, if the boat gets fixed or they get a tow. Call Captain Don, schedule a fishing cruise, and I’m sure he’ll tell you all about it. You bring the beer.

So, here’s my story. I get to the sand... wait, wait. Let me tell you this first. Bear in mind I’m a little delirious. I’m starting to break down a little and notice that when I blink I see about 30 tiny green spots in my vision. They are peppered with red. I know that this is okay until my peripheral vision goes, then it’s night night time. The point... consider this story as if it’s a waking dream, maybe fiction. It’s what I know.

Okay, instead of flopping and laughing, I’m on edge. I see something like three totems. Stacked rocks or coconuts on the right. I ignore them. Just walking now is an experience. I fight the urge and stay upright. I promised my friend Ceci I would bring her back a small piece of driftwood like I have before. I walk the beach line to the south looking for something small, geometric, bone white and dry. I pick up a few pieces, and after about what seems like 5 minutes I choose one. I tuck it under the left thigh of my swim suit. I keep walking.

Suddenly I realize I am in a world of junk! This isn’t the pristine virgin beach I had imagined. It’s awash with everything. All bleached. Glow-sticks whose lights had gone out long before I decided to do this, whiffle balls, beach balls, bottles, cans, eight and a half feet of a nine foot surfboard, and on and on. What a shame. What a lesson. We are choking the beaches of places where people barely even live. Why? To teach our kids how to play baseball? To have potions to make our jeans clean? To drink processed sugar? To shoot a bigger barrel? Here it all is, all our wants materialized and washed up on this relentless beach.

Focus on the good. What do I see? ‘Opihi shells. I see one, I see another. I realize that I will have to get out in the same surf that stripped Bill of his goggles. I can’t pick up this whole beach. Don’t be greedy, don’t be like the ghosts that live in all those people’s empty bottles. Look, feel. It comes to me. Pick ‘opihi shells that nest. Bring home five, for your family of five. Tell them. They will listen. I find five shells; the biggest is almost the size of an Eisenhower dollar. I nest them, sweet Susan, Benjamin, Nathan, and little Naomi, about as big around as a dime. I package the family together and tuck them under the right thigh of my suit.

I am done here.

I look toward the ocean. Leave now? Wait, what an experience. A state lawyer friend of mine advised me on this adventure. Technically, the federal government owns (and shares to the public) everything up to the high water mark. Arguably, that is everything up to the first growing vegetation. A line of vegetation.

I look. The berm of sand slopes sharply at about 20 degrees. From the lava teeth to the vegetation, it’s about two men high over a fifteen yard run. At the top of the slope are alfalfa-like grass tufts. If I could just get a little closer look at how this plane meets that crazy mountain on the left. Step. It looks almost like Diamond Head. Step. See how the lines run sideways across it, instead of up and down? Step. How does a mountain that massive merge into a plane like this!? Step. I am 6 feet from the grass.

Two of the totems I saw spring up. The third never does, but runs to the side, very, very fast. The one on the left is a beautiful young woman in a blue and white flannel shirt with jeans or slacks. She is back-lit; I can’t tell. She looks like bronze version of how I remember my wife the year we were married. Tall, flowing long hair, half-curly and long. Before I can see her face, a camera with a telephoto lens comes to her eye.

The second totem which sprang up at the same time as the female was wearing what could have been a blue or drab Dickies work jacket. A ball cap, and some kind of pants to match. He had a very old rifle. At the end of the muzzle was either a silencer or a plug. It was in his left arm, the butt on his hip. The muzzle pointed at a forty-five degree angle away and over my head.

I didn’t look for the third. The second had a gun. That was all I needed to know.

The surf was pounding when the second said either, “You, come here!”, or “You are trespassing!” I know. I’m not sure how you could mistake the two, but they were far off, and as they say, I was “All buss”.

I have a talent. It’s one I’ve always had. It’s an advantage I have over most people that I’m not afraid to give you the in scoop on. When I smile, people know that I mean it. Maybe it’s why I resonate so comfortably here. There is aloha. We all have it. Let it in. Let it out. Show it when you smile. Don’t cheat me, give me the real confection. Show me your smile so I can see you.

I smiled, I extended my right hand in a still wave. I kept my smile over my shoulder as my body turned. When my body had turned, I walked back to the water. I could feel the rifle relax.

Getting out had all the same challenges of getting in. Maybe more. In my haste I had put a three inch gash in the bottom of my foot. Not a good place to be bleeding. Also, the sets had changed; instead of three or four in a set, it was five or six. I skulled in four inches of water and grabbed rock eight feet in front of where the overhead waves crashed. After the first set, I made a mad sprint for the outside. Instead of a minute, it was more like twenty seconds until the next set. I jammed up and scraped a finger looking for something to hold when the surprise set rolled in.

The set passed, I made another mad dash.

Out.

Crash, not yet, dive again. Crash, sprint. I was sprinting so hard in the surf avoiding the lava below I could smell my own blood somehow in my nose. Rifle behind me, waves in front, I eventually got into deeper water.

As I’m coming out, I see the boat moving away. What? Is this a joke? Like when you tell your friend to get in a car and move away? I can feel my foot bleeding out. This isn’t good, lots of fish here. How about predators? What’s happening? What if they can’t see me? What if everyone else has returned to the boat, they saw the rifle and wanted to get out of range?

Keep swimming?

Horizon is still interrupted by overhead waves. Where is the boat? There it is...

Keep swimming!

The boat, I think it’s stopping.

Keep swimming.


Captain Don lowers the ladder a hundred yards outside of Niʻihau and mutters something - I still don’t know what. We have to go now. Now! Get in the boat.

I hit the boat cushions, so spent I think I’m going to pop. The boat speeds off.



August 30

Tonight, I’m home with my wife and kids. Tucking the kids in at prayer time, I shared with them a child’s version of my adventure. How I swam to the end of the island chain. How I saw friendly sharks and beautiful coral. How I went to an island where you can only look at the beach. Then I pulled my five ‘opihi shells out. They were safe and dry all tucked inside each other. I gave the smallest one to Naomi, the next one to Nate, the middle one to Ben, then Susan’s and then I took mine.

We talked about what it means to be family and all together surrounded by each other. Then Naomi placed her shell inside Nate’s. Nate understood and put his inside Ben’s. Ben inside his mother’s, and my shell was the binder.

We said prayers and thanked the Lord for all that we had learned, and my safe passage, and then we all hugged, and the kids tucked their shells under their pillows.



Sunday, August 29, 2010

Kaulakahi Channel Crossing

This Sunday, August 29, I'll be swimming the channel from Kauaʻi to Niʻihau. I've set up a separate page that Sue will be updating when she can, in case you want to check in and see how I'm doing.